Depression

kaio393: sup

WarriorAtHeart07: what did i tell you about saying 'sup'?

kaio393: sorry

kaio393: Howsit going

WarriorAtHeart07: good

kaio393: keeeewl

kaio393: What you doing so late?

WarriorAtHeart07: updating some confidential stuff

kaio393: Oh ok :0

kaio393: :)*

kaio393: I just bceame a top poster on a forum I joined like a week ago :P

WarriorAtHeart07: nice

kaio393: its krayzie

kaio393: and trying to find a new iPod >_<

WarriorAtHeart07: if you would have asked i could have given you one free a month ago

WarriorAtHeart07: but i gave it away already

kaio393: Which line?

kaio393: (like nano, shuffle)

WarriorAtHeart07: nano

kaio393: oh i want a regular one

WarriorAtHeart07: it was 4 G new version

kaio393: My bros have those

WarriorAtHeart07: but i was feeling very good that day and gave it to someone for free

kaio393: I don't really like the design

kaio393: well that was nice..

WarriorAtHeart07: seeing as it's a $300 ($400, maybe) - very nice

kaio393: 0.o?

kaio393: you mean a 4 GB one?

WarriorAtHeart07: that's why i said 4 G

WarriorAtHeart07: i never put the 'b'

kaio393: oh... in iPod terms G usually stands for generation

WarriorAtHeart07: oh

kaio393: im looking for an iPod 5.5 G

kaio393: yeah

WarriorAtHeart07: i don't know what 'g' mine is

WarriorAtHeart07: but it's 4 gb

WarriorAtHeart07: anyway, i gave it away

kaio393: ures a 2 G

kaio393: probably

kaio393: anda 4 giger runs at 200

kaio393: brb'

kaio393: http://store.apple.com/1-800-MY-APPLE/WebObjects/AppleStore?family=iPodnano

WarriorAtHeart07: not when you include 5 cases & all the accesseries (sp?) you have

WarriorAtHeart07: i hate you

kaio393: ?

kaio393: why?

WarriorAtHeart07: because you are the reason kiki hasn't been close to me recently

kaio393: :(

kaio393: how>?

WarriorAtHeart07: how do you think?

kaio393: I am never on the phone with her...

WarriorAtHeart07: aren't ya'll going out?

kaio393: Yeah

WarriorAtHeart07: that's why

WarriorAtHeart07: thanks, kyle, for losing me my best friend

kaio393: ;'(

kaio393: :'(

kaio393: I am sorry

WarriorAtHeart07: you ruined everything

kaio393: How?!!?

WarriorAtHeart07: because of ya'll going out

WarriorAtHeart07: she was the only person that understood me

kaio393: :(

kaio393: how is it my fault we a re going out?

kaio393: I love her and she loves me

WarriorAtHeart07: she never wants to talk anymore, since tuesday

kaio393: :O

kaio393: Well

kaio393: cal her

WarriorAtHeart07: i haven't talked to anyone since

WarriorAtHeart07: her phone's un-plugged

kaio393: ?

kaio393: I called her yesterday fine

kaio393: (we only talked for like 3 seconds)

WarriorAtHeart07: here was my day - i started at a blank screen crying for 75% of the day

WarriorAtHeart07: wow

kaio393: :'(

WarriorAtHeart07: that's about my all-time high since wed.

kaio393: why did you stare at a blank screen crying?

WarriorAtHeart07: for reason's that you don't get

WarriorAtHeart07: there was more then one reason i didn't want you to go out with her

kaio393: ..

WarriorAtHeart07: i knew what it would do

kaio393: ....

kaio393: well I love her

kaio393: I won't just break up with her

kaio393: :9

kaio393: :(*

WarriorAtHeart07: congrats

kaio393: ty

WarriorAtHeart07: i told her once it didn't matter what she did as long as she was happy

WarriorAtHeart07: i told her she could ruin my life

kaio393: .

kaio393: then why are you complaigning

WarriorAtHeart07: for her happiness

WarriorAtHeart07: because i didn't say i wouldn't be sorry i said it

kaio393: well

kaio393: thanks for telling her to do what she willed

WarriorAtHeart07: i told her a long time ago

kaio393: oh

WarriorAtHeart07: when's a counciler when you need one

kaio393: asleep

kaio393: :P

WarriorAtHeart07: i wasn't joking

kaio393: well they are

WarriorAtHeart07: i don't think my life crashing before my eyes is funny

kaio393: hm

kaio393: http://www.titane.ca/concordia/dfar251/igod/main.html

WarriorAtHeart07: it may seem like an overreaction to you, but somewhere, kiki is wondering if what she did was right

kaio393: 0.0

kaio393: oh no nononononono

WarriorAtHeart07: i'm not for humor right now, kyle

kaio393: me either

kaio393: why is she wondering?

WarriorAtHeart07: for reason's you don't know

WarriorAtHeart07: for thing's you've never heard

WarriorAtHeart07: thing's never meant to be replayed in anyone's mind

WarriorAtHeart07: by i know she is right now

WarriorAtHeart07: i can feel it

WarriorAtHeart07: exactly 18 min. and 26 sec. ago i declared us not bff anymore

kaio393: Why?

WarriorAtHeart07: because she knew what would happen

WarriorAtHeart07: and she did it anyway

WarriorAtHeart07: you don't know half of what happened when she said 'yes' more then you would normally think a word could do

kaio393: Well, technically she said Fine

WarriorAtHeart07: it doesn't matter

kaio393: *shrug*

WarriorAtHeart07: either way, it happened

kaio393: Yeah

kaio393: But why do you regret that you have made two others happy?

WarriorAtHeart07: because it was at the cost of my own happiness

WarriorAtHeart07: and i miss it

kaio393: Well

kaio393: why can't you find happiness elsewhere?

WarriorAtHeart07: it's harder then that

kaio393: Hm

kaio393: Well

kaio393: you could start a blog :)

kaio393: blogger.com

WarriorAtHeart07: i don't want to brag that i'm the most misirable girl ever

kaio393: heh

kaio393: well just try it

kaio393: http://impossiblekai.blogspot.com/

kaio393: mine^^

kaio393: rather long

kaio393: only one post

WarriorAtHeart07: i don't want to brag about my life

WarriorAtHeart07: no one wants to hear that i don't have one anymore

kaio393: Yeah

kaio393: they do

kaio393: trust me

WarriorAtHeart07: I DON'T WANT TO BLOG WHAT I FEEL

kaio393: proof

kaio393: http://www.wired.com/culture/lifestyle/multimedia/2007/04/ss_raves?slide=12

WarriorAtHeart07: THERE ARE NO WORDS

kaio393: just tell everything you always tell me

WarriorAtHeart07: i don't tell you anything important

WarriorAtHeart07: you don't understand

kaio393: well

kaio393: Post everything you feel

WarriorAtHeart07: it's like the end of the world for me, but worse

WarriorAtHeart07: I DON'T WANT TO POST IT!

kaio393: why?

WarriorAtHeart07: TRY TO UNDERSTAND

WarriorAtHeart07: because i don't feel like telling people my life's over

kaio393: people will eat it up!

WarriorAtHeart07: here, i'll tell you basicly a sum of what i feel - kyle & kiki ruined my life

WarriorAtHeart07: I DON'T WANT TO!

kaio393: ok...

kaio393: how did we ruin your life?

WarriorAtHeart07: I DON'T WANT TO!

WarriorAtHeart07: I DON'T WANT TO!

WarriorAtHeart07: I DON'T WANT TO!

WarriorAtHeart07: I DON'T WANT TO!

WarriorAtHeart07: I DON'T WANT TO!

WarriorAtHeart07: THERE - DO YOU FINALLY GET IT?

kaio393: ok...

WarriorAtHeart07: I HATE YOU

kaio393: y?

WarriorAtHeart07: because of so many things

kaio393: ..........

WarriorAtHeart07: 1) you ruined my life

WarriorAtHeart07: 2) you took my best friend away

kaio393: 1) how

WarriorAtHeart07: BY ASKING OUT KIKI

WarriorAtHeart07: THAT'S HOW MUCH I CAN TELL YOU

WarriorAtHeart07: THE REST INVOLVES KIKI

WarriorAtHeart07: AND EVEN THOUGH SHE DOESN'T CARE ABOUT ME, I CARE ABOUT HER

kaio393: ok

WarriorAtHeart07: UGH - NOW I HAVE TO LISTEN TO MY SONG

WarriorAtHeart07: DARN, I WAS ABOUT TO GO ONE WEEK WITHOUT HEARING IT

kaio393: ...

WarriorAtHeart07: (IT'S MY SUICDE SONG [THE REASON WHY I'M NOT DEAD, BASICLY])

kaio393: ok

WarriorAtHeart07: EVENTUALLY IT WON'T WORK

kaio393: ..

WarriorAtHeart07: but at least it will for awhil;e

WarriorAtHeart07: *awhile

kaio393: and what can i do to help>

WarriorAtHeart07: something that you wouldn't do

kaio393: .

WarriorAtHeart07: and you know what it is

WarriorAtHeart07: but i won't ask

kaio393: *slump*

kaio393: I'm sorry

WarriorAtHeart07: one second - i ran out of my 5 boxes of tissues

WarriorAtHeart07: going to steal some from my sister

kaio393: k

WarriorAtHeart07: brb

kaio393: k

WarriorAtHeart07: back

WarriorAtHeart07: 10 should be enough, i hope

kaio393: k

kaio393: maybe

kaio393: all i can really offer

kaio393: http://www.drugstore.com/qxp141633_333181_sespider/kleenex/anti_viral_tissue.htm

WarriorAtHeart07: just stop

kaio393: :(

kaio393: ok

WarriorAtHeart07: you know what you could do, you never will

WarriorAtHeart07: and that's all you can do

kaio393: I am sorry

kaio393: but I won't

WarriorAtHeart07: i know

kaio393: sorry

WarriorAtHeart07: it's not even sorry anymore

WarriorAtHeart07: you're not

kaio393: Yes I am

kaio393: http://mind.schoolnet.ir/Young%20minds/do_you_ever_feel_depressed.htm

WarriorAtHeart07: no, the booklet is more sorry then you

kaio393: :(

WarriorAtHeart07: btw, if you have a wedding - i'm not coming, don't waste an invite

kaio393: I will still send an invite

WarriorAtHeart07: i'll ignore

kaio393: k

WarriorAtHeart07: night

WarriorAtHeart07: don't except me to change my attitude tomorrow

WarriorAtHeart07: i hope you and kiki have a good time together anyway

kaio393: kk

kaio393: thanks you

WarriorAtHeart07: w/e